...at the end part of the movie The Love Affair.
Pretty dumb, i'll own up to that accusation. BUT it's a touching movie! haha! i'm bound to shed a tear or two. :p
Anyway, over the past few days I have come to the conclusion that I should get rid of ideations of romance and building romantic relationships with someone.
*sigh*
two ex - boyfriends and one current "relationship" with someone similar to what Amanda Peet and Ashton Kutcher had in the movie A Lot Like Love isn't exactly what I had in mind for a track record in the "world of love"... whatever that "love" may mean.
*sigh*
I have always meditated the Scripture found in I Corinthians 13:1-13 wherein apostle Paul speaks of the real essence of LOVE. As I continued my journey in faith, I have been given the privilege of attending seminars on Love, Courtship and Marriage...
...but perhaps I've never really appreciated it? Perhaps the reason why I never really took the principles and values that the speakers were trying to inculcate seriously was for the very fact that i thought it doesn't really apply to me. Like as if I were a cyborg; incapable of feeling...
...oh how very mistaken I was. Very mistaken, indeed.
LIMERENCE is taking me away...
(Ecclesiastes 1:2)
"Vanity of vanities! ...all is vanity."
time to grow up.
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
i reeeeeally
hate competitions.
Feeling the need to compete for your heart just turns me off.
Perhaps being turned off is a good thing.
Perhaps it's just what I need...
Honestly? Right now I really don't need this.......... Limerence.
Feeling the need to compete for your heart just turns me off.
Perhaps being turned off is a good thing.
Perhaps it's just what I need...
Honestly? Right now I really don't need this.......... Limerence.
Sunday, February 20, 2011
thinking of YOU
(breathe in, and breathe out)
Whenever i feel like i want to do something CRAZY and completely unlike me, i think of YOU.
...and wonder how it would feel like to kiss you.
buti nalang hindi posible ito. ^_^ hahaha!
we can always choose our actions,
but not its consequences...
'cause you caught me offguard,
and now i'm running and screaming
"i feel like a hero, and you are my heroine
do you know that YOUR LOVE is the sweetest sin?"
Whenever i feel like i want to do something CRAZY and completely unlike me, i think of YOU.
...and wonder how it would feel like to kiss you.
buti nalang hindi posible ito. ^_^ hahaha!
we can always choose our actions,
but not its consequences...
'cause you caught me offguard,
and now i'm running and screaming
"i feel like a hero, and you are my heroine
do you know that YOUR LOVE is the sweetest sin?"
buffering...
...the movie "The Corpse Bride".
nakakabitin, pero pagtiya-tiyagaan ko! XD
mukha kasing promising eh. hahaha!
***instead of doing my research work / case study/ SOL 1 reflection notes / CBQ practices...
...i do this. :))
Prinsesa ng procrastination... :p
PAGBIGYAN NA!!! hahaha
nakakabitin, pero pagtiya-tiyagaan ko! XD
mukha kasing promising eh. hahaha!
***instead of doing my research work / case study/ SOL 1 reflection notes / CBQ practices...
...i do this. :))
Prinsesa ng procrastination... :p
PAGBIGYAN NA!!! hahaha
Saturday, February 19, 2011
...searching
ON THIS DAY, GOD WANTS YOU TO KNOW THAT...
...that decision is only a wishful thinking until you take that first irreversible step. You can tell yourself that you have already decided, that nothing now can stop you, but if that step backwards is so much safer than that step forward, what will hold you true to your path when the going gets tough? Sometimes the right thing to do is to take that first irreversible step, the one after which you cannot go back. And now, for you, is one of those times.
I got this from that application in facebook called, "On this day, God wants you to know..."
It cheered me up a bit because given the fact that I seldom believe these sort of "fortune cookie" gig, the message hits the spot. It's exactly what I needed to hear...
...God is awesome. His timing is ALWAYS perfect. (Ecclesiastes 3:1)
TRUST in the Lord with all your heart,
LEAN NOT on your own understanding
in all your ways ACKNOWLEDGE Him,
and He will direct your path.
(Proverbs 3:5-6)
(yes, Lord... T_T)
...that decision is only a wishful thinking until you take that first irreversible step. You can tell yourself that you have already decided, that nothing now can stop you, but if that step backwards is so much safer than that step forward, what will hold you true to your path when the going gets tough? Sometimes the right thing to do is to take that first irreversible step, the one after which you cannot go back. And now, for you, is one of those times.
***
It cheered me up a bit because given the fact that I seldom believe these sort of "fortune cookie" gig, the message hits the spot. It's exactly what I needed to hear...
...God is awesome. His timing is ALWAYS perfect. (Ecclesiastes 3:1)
TRUST in the Lord with all your heart,
LEAN NOT on your own understanding
in all your ways ACKNOWLEDGE Him,
and He will direct your path.
(Proverbs 3:5-6)
(yes, Lord... T_T)
***
Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, and whose hope is the LORD.
For he shall be like a tree planted by the waters, which spreads out its roots by the river,
and will not fear when heat comes; but its leaf will be green,
and will not be anxious in the year of drought, nor will cease from yielding fruit.
The heart is deceitful of above all things, and desperately wicked; who can know it?
I, the LORD, search the heart, I test the mind, even to give every man according to his ways,
according to the fruit of his doings."
--Jeremiah 17:7-10
***
Dear God,
Whenever I am down and no one seems to be around, You are always near.
I cannot fathom the greatness of Your love, nor the vast understanding that You have
of the ways of men... of the ways of MORTAL men...
Lord You created the heavens, the earth, the complexity of the universe, and the intricate parts and pieces of the human body. You placed everything in accordance to how You want it to be, and it works perfectly the way You intended it to work... ALL the works of Your hands are marvelous and just SOOO amazing! Lord You know every heart, every thought, every desire, every secret, every deed, EVERYTHING! You know me... the depths of my heart You have searched, and the faults of my life does not escape from Your eyes... I am but dust. I am but mud. I am but clay. I am but nothing more than... nothing...
...and yet, Lord, You love me the same!
I need not know. I am tired of asking why. But please, just let me comprehend this much: confirm to me Your will, Lord... and lead me to desire to obey and no longer rebel.
itrustYou.
help my unbelief.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
the art of SHUTTING UP
the little things you do to me are taking me over
i want to show you everything inside of me
like a nervous heart that is crazy beating
my feet is stuck here against the pavement
i wanna break free, i wanna make it
closer to your eyes, catch your attention
before you pass me by...
back up, back up, take another chance
don't you mess up, mess up,
i don't wanna lose you
wake up, wake up, this aint just a thing
that you give up, give up
don't you say that i'd be better off, better off
sitting by myself and wondering
better off, better off without you, boy...
Isn't it ironic how lonesome people, the kind who stray away from people, are the ones IN NEED of people to care for them? hehe. There is this thing we call silence in the "Therapeutic Communication" we took up in nursing one time. The concept is that you are to simply sit with the patient in silence, and this already brings comfort to them. This gestrure, the "silence" works like this: the nurse shuts up and waits for the patient to be comfortable to say something. If the patient doesn't say anything, that's fine too. The nurse just stays there, as a gesture of "offering of self"... This gesture is somewhat saying, "hey, i'm right here if you need someone to talk to" without actually saying so. The "not speaking" makes the offering of self more genuine.
It kind of works like a tap on the back, or when you hld someone's hand, or when you hug someone... or when someone hugs you... no words. Just pure silence... allowing the hearts to speak with each other, the spirits to connect, and the soul to encourage each other with the message that says, "you are not alone"...
Yet being alone is nice though. It makes you think. It makes you reflect. But what if you just need a piece of advice, some words of wisdom and encouragement to help you get through with all the mess you've gone through, and there's just ABSOLUTELY NO ONE you can turn to?
I know this is a lie. hehe! It's just that I feel like the sincerity of people who are only "trying to help" is sometimes questionable... "The heart is deceitful of all things... who can know it?" (Jeremiah 17) That's why silence works best at times. BUT SOMETIMES silence is also not helpful because there's just SOMETHING I want to hear, and I don't have any idea what that "something" might be, and yet no one, no one, NO ONE is there to say these words to me! T_T
Sometimes, or most of the time, i wish God Himself would come down from heaven and just touch me, heal me piece by piece, and clean me all squeaky and shiny... PHYSICALLY COME DOWN and really be with me. I KNOW why this will never happen, well, not now anyway, but I just can't help but whine and ask and pray that this wish of mine would come true! haha! i'm so freaking lost right now i really have no idea what the hello i should do with my life...
...a phase. i know. a phase. i am undergoing a phase...
one day i am gonna go back to this experience and say,
(silence)
...well, i'm gonna say something, someday...
...but not today. nope. nothing for today.
i want to show you everything inside of me
like a nervous heart that is crazy beating
my feet is stuck here against the pavement
i wanna break free, i wanna make it
closer to your eyes, catch your attention
before you pass me by...
back up, back up, take another chance
don't you mess up, mess up,
i don't wanna lose you
wake up, wake up, this aint just a thing
that you give up, give up
don't you say that i'd be better off, better off
sitting by myself and wondering
better off, better off without you, boy...
Isn't it ironic how lonesome people, the kind who stray away from people, are the ones IN NEED of people to care for them? hehe. There is this thing we call silence in the "Therapeutic Communication" we took up in nursing one time. The concept is that you are to simply sit with the patient in silence, and this already brings comfort to them. This gestrure, the "silence" works like this: the nurse shuts up and waits for the patient to be comfortable to say something. If the patient doesn't say anything, that's fine too. The nurse just stays there, as a gesture of "offering of self"... This gesture is somewhat saying, "hey, i'm right here if you need someone to talk to" without actually saying so. The "not speaking" makes the offering of self more genuine.
It kind of works like a tap on the back, or when you hld someone's hand, or when you hug someone... or when someone hugs you... no words. Just pure silence... allowing the hearts to speak with each other, the spirits to connect, and the soul to encourage each other with the message that says, "you are not alone"...
Yet being alone is nice though. It makes you think. It makes you reflect. But what if you just need a piece of advice, some words of wisdom and encouragement to help you get through with all the mess you've gone through, and there's just ABSOLUTELY NO ONE you can turn to?
I know this is a lie. hehe! It's just that I feel like the sincerity of people who are only "trying to help" is sometimes questionable... "The heart is deceitful of all things... who can know it?" (Jeremiah 17) That's why silence works best at times. BUT SOMETIMES silence is also not helpful because there's just SOMETHING I want to hear, and I don't have any idea what that "something" might be, and yet no one, no one, NO ONE is there to say these words to me! T_T
Sometimes, or most of the time, i wish God Himself would come down from heaven and just touch me, heal me piece by piece, and clean me all squeaky and shiny... PHYSICALLY COME DOWN and really be with me. I KNOW why this will never happen, well, not now anyway, but I just can't help but whine and ask and pray that this wish of mine would come true! haha! i'm so freaking lost right now i really have no idea what the hello i should do with my life...
...a phase. i know. a phase. i am undergoing a phase...
one day i am gonna go back to this experience and say,
(silence)
...well, i'm gonna say something, someday...
...but not today. nope. nothing for today.
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